The struggle of parents.

I sometimes look at my parents, and I wonder how time flies. It seems just like yesterday when I was 10 and wearing this large, white, princess gown that my parents got for my primary school graduation.

I thought about the challenges they must have faced raising I and my siblings, and it humbles me.

As children, you always see your parents as authority figures. As those people that it is their sole mission in life to spoil your fun, tell you what to do, how to do it, where to be and how to be it. But as you grow older, as you get to a certain age of maturity, you begin to see them for who they are. Humans. Real people.

Real people with emotions, with doubts, with uncertainty, with weaknesses, with fears trying to make their way in the world with the information and resources available in their arsenal. Their decisions might not have been the best route of action, but they got the job done.

When this realization sets in, you can now call yourself an adult. And then you begin to understand some certain things on your own too. Then you understand…I’m not exactly sure of what but you just understand. Not exactly approve of how you were raised (because let’s be honest, some of their methods were a bit high-handed) but you understand why they did what they did.

When I was much younger, my parents wouldn’t let me go anywhere. I always thought them over-protective. And yet, years later, my heart leaps into my throat whenever my sister goes to work, and my heart stays in my throat until she gets back. My brother moved to another country, and I can’t help but worry for him.

Is he okay? Is he eating well? Is he sleeping fine? Does he need my help?

I laugh at myself when I catch myself doing these things. I recognized those emotions for what they were. Love, and fear.

Fear of losing the ones you love.

The older generation might have their faults, but let’s not forget that they are humans too. They bleed red blood.